~Family~

Major family changes are hard. Say what you will, but family is family, and no matter how people treat each other during a lifetime, in the end, family sticks together. In crisis we see clearly that love and comfort and holding each other up are the only real issues.

This month we lost my husband's mother. The woman who adopted him as a skinny, five month old infant. The woman who nurtured him, sang to him, fattened him up, maybe spoiled him a bit...his mother. She may not have given birth to him, but she was indeed his mother. Think of all that wonderful word means, and the deep and painful loss when the woman who wears that title leaves your life. My sweet husband is really grieving hard for his mamma.

I don't usually share anything too private in our lives, but I wanted to share this, because so many families are torn apart by stupid things, including my own. I rarely talk to my own mother, and less still my only sister. It's mutual, and I don't feel guilty- I have tried to mak an effort, but still...I know in the end all of the reasons won't matter and a loss will still be bitter.

Here's Doug's mom looking down at him, newly adopted, in his crib. Doesn't she look lovely in her nighty? My goodness, I never have dressed for bed. An ratty old T-shirt is my standard. Poor Doug, look how he's come down in the world after marrying!

Here she is, dressed and put together again (like always) holding my dear little husband's hand. Isn't he cute! I never saw my mother-in-law looking anything but neat, tidy, and put together until she was very ill with cancer in the end. Even the very last day she was awake, she worried about her hair when we took her for a drive. That was precious. Reminded me of my little sister patting her nose with powder in the labor and delivery room, in labor with her first child. Hilarious!

Here's my darling, large and handsome husband. As you can see, he turned out well, he was mothered properly. He even grew up to be a wonderful husband and father- upholding the family tradition and adopting a child himself. She may not have given him her genetics, but she did give him her morals, the ability to grow up in the church, and opportunities of discussing politics, history, sports, and any number of other topics at the dinner table. He's not just a set of gorgeous muscles and pearly whites- nope, this guy is able to hold an intelligent conversation on many topics. As long as he's not hanging out with Rob. *U*

Here is a picture of my mother-in-law and myself ten years ago.