Keeping in Mind
the Important Things
Feb. 2013
(this was a message I shared with our homeschool group)
I’ll be honest:
I’m tired, dry, and often overwhelmed lately. SO much so that I completely
forgot about getting a speaker for tonight. To top it off I had no topic in
mind.
About a week
ago I remembered this was coming up and I panicked! Out loud. My husband looked
over at me and said, “Dalyn, why don’t you ladies just talk about what’s really
important?”
I knew exactly
what he was talking about because he reminds me all the time-
Whenever the
house is a mess (OFTEN) and I get stressed about it.
When I have
juggled sick or crabby babies and appointments all day (OFTEN) and haven’t even
thought of what to make for dinner-(AGAIN)- and start to feel like the world’s
worst homeschool mom because I’ve sent Ben off to figure out an assignment for
himself (AGAIN)because I’m too busy or too tired to even think. I’m up at night
with fussy babies and up early to feed the preschooler and toddler and
exhausted by 9 AM.
Or I’m feeling
condemned because I haven’t been able to sit down and read my Bible for days
(AGAIN)- Doug says, “Dalyn,
quit complaining, so you don’t get to read it? You’re living it!”
And that’s the
point right there- we are living life with our families-either faithful to
God’s Word or not.
Our families-
husband and kids- are more important than the laundry,
The dirty
dishes,
The lack of
sleep or messy house.
It’s the people
who live and visit inside the house that are important.
Just this week
I had a friend call me sobbing- one of her adult sons was leaving home for the
first time and going to work in another state. She knew it was time for him to
go and work out being a man- but all she
could think of watching him drive away was that she wished she had held him and
hugged him more- wished she hadn’t cared about the housework for one minute-
wished she didn’t have a bunch of regrets and where in the world did the time
go? It seems there’s never enough time with our kids when they’re older…days
when they are little it seems there’s too much time, right? J
We women are
the heart of the home. Our kids will leave home with memories. Hopefully good
ones- about traditions and rituals, and favorite meals and comfort and
security. We women build community and family. We make or break the whole
operation. It’s a heavy responsibility, but more than that it’s an amazing
privilege.
We can see that
when our priorities are in line with God’s.
Do you remember
when Pharaoh ordered all the Hebrew baby boys born to be killed at birth? The
midwives who were given those orders disobeyed. Then they made the excuse to
Pharaoh that the reason they hadn’t been killing those babies was because the
Hebrew women were more vigorous than the Egyptian women and gave birth before
the midwives arrived. Don’t you love that not-so-subtle dig on the Egyptians?
Do you know how
the LORD rewarded the midwives? Exodus 1:20 says He rewarded them by giving
them their own families!
Today’s modern
woman might not appreciate that. As a matter of fact there are a number of
feminists that might be offended by God’s idea of a reward.
To be rewarded
with a household to care for? Hungry husband, dirty socks? Poopie diapers and
dirty dishes?
Doesn’t sound
like such a generous gift when you look at it like that, huh? Maybe that’s
what’s wrong…focus on the negatives instead of positives. Peanutbutter and
jelly fingers instead of hugs with chubby arms and gifts of dandelion flowers
from a sincere heart?
Today’s modern
woman might rather have the reward of an all -expenses paid vacation away from
responsibilities instead. But God sees things differently and we will too when
we align our thoughts with His Word. Truth is stranger than fiction. J
One evening not
long ago I actually had a bit of free time. Imagine that. I turned to my Bible
and an app on my iPhone that has the Strong’s definition of almost all the
words in the Bible. I took apart Proverbs 14 and got stuck on 14:1 for an hour.
Then I spent a little time on 14:4. These both really spoke to my situation and
clarified, at least for me, God’s mind on the matter.
Let me read
these to you- (Bible/notes)
Proverbs 14:1
“The wise woman
builds (BANA- build/by obtaining children) her house (family), but the foolish
(silly) pulls I down (destroys) with her own hands (means, power, direction).
Proverbs 14:4
Where no oxen
(family) are, the trough(manger,stall) is clean; but much increase (abundance,
income, produce) comes by the strength (vigor, force) of an ox.
Now, let me
read a paraphrase to you in light of the original meanings of some of those key
words:
The woman with
God’s wisdom builds her home and family – she obtains children, but the
foolish, silly woman destroys her home and family with her own power and means
and direction.
14:4 An empty
house stays tidy, but abundance comes by the vigor and strength of a family.
(think in agrarian and figurative terms)
I was given a
lot of strength with this little study of mine. It confirmed again the
direction my family has taken. James 1:27 in the Amplified versions says this:
External
religious worship [religion as it is expressed in outward acts] that is pure
and unblemished in the sight of God the Father is this: to visit and help and
care for the orphans and widows in their affliction and need, and to keep
oneself unspotted and uncontaminated from the world.
I’m often the
foolish woman instead of the wise- but when I’m feeling bogged down with my
circumstances- dirty diapers and 4 AM feedings and early rising every morning-
the Lord and my husband both affirm these as much more important than the
ideals I keep in mind:
A sparkling
clean house
A well-ordered
and directed school day for Ben
A gourmet
dinner that I’ve grown and raised from scratch- my hobbies
Those are good
things. But they are not the most important.
Back to Ben and
homeschooling- he may not be getting a stellar education at this moment in
time, but he is learning to live generously James 1:27 among other things. I
have no intention of shirking on his education for long. I firmly believe in
educating and equipping my children for anything God calls them to- this just
happens to be the equipping season I guess.
Ben is a 14
year old boy who:
Reads his Bible
on his own
Makes homemade
pancakes from scratch for breakfast and sometimes dinner too, because he likes
to do it.
Changes poopie
diapers without being asked. For real!
Makes me a cup
of tea when he sees I’m weary.
Prays with and
for his little brother.
These are more
valuable to his character than acing the SATs I think J
See, I’m trying
to keep in mind what’s really important.
Everyone has
seasons of difficulty and trials and it’s easy to consider giving up when we
feel we aren’t doing a good job, or when we feel in over our head.
But God doesn’t
raise quitters. He raises up mighty warriors. Much of the language of the
Proverbs 31 passage is written with military terms. We women are meant to fight
for our families. We do that in so many ways. For one thing we provide the most
valuable thing- a comfortable and nurturing environment in which to raise
eternal beings entrusted to us by God Himself.
“So do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly
rewarded….” Hebrews 10:35 a
And we all know
how God rewards women who please Him. J
